3-27-12

Today was a mixed bag. I slept most of the morning and for the first time ever, didn’t go to work because I didn’t think I could. In the past, I have had bad days and stayed home (I work from home often – it’s a 2 hour each way commute to my office in New York City), or been concerned about over-exerting myself. However, last night, I decided that I felt ill enough that the idea of being that far from home and having to travel on a long train ride were too much. I missed a meeting, but was able to have co-workers, who were supposed to be part of the meeting anyway, cover for me.

 

Something else weighing on my mind is how much my illness is affecting my wife Maria. She is very stressed and I don’t blame her. For me, it’s easy; I have to deal with it. I don’t have a choice. I have accepted that I am mostly powerless to control this. Maria has to watch me suffer though. In many ways, I think that’s harder and she feels more helpless and out of control than I do.

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